An Oldskool Guide to Netiquette

I’m a geek. An old-school geek. I started out on a Commodore 64 and worked my way up to what my hobby is today – hardware and network administration. I don’t do it professionally. I don’t want to destroy my childhood memories of fun and games with stress and pressure. Along the way I learned quite a bit. Through all the tweaking and posting and calling and chatting, I learned a great deal. Here are some of the biggest lessons, often learned the hard way.

1. Always check your cables
2. Always proof your entries – preferably before you hit enter. (for those of us who remember entering machine language via hexadecimal code on an alpha-numeric keypad)
3. Double check the phone number you dialed for that BBS. Mrs. Johnson is tired of tones in her ear – they mess with her hearing aid.
4. Be clear about the subject you are posting about, and to whom you are speaking. Two ladies talking about where they like to keep their purses entangling with a guy asking about interesting locations can be quite messy.
5. NO FLAMING. This is a big one. You’ll often see it on today’s version of BBS systems, the open forum. Basically, this means if you can’t say anything nice, keep your hands away from the keyboard. The internet is forever, those posts don’t go away.
6. There are no girls on the net. While we all know that this is not literally true, it does make a very valid point. No one can see you. No one can know anything about you unless you tell them. We can’t see your face as you speak. You have no gender, no age, no race.
7. This is more of a corollary to the previous two – Your facial expression as you post has nothing to do with how your words will be read. NO ONE CAN SEE YOU!!! No matter how many smileys or emoticons you use, if what you say is ugly, then it’s ugly and no amount of 🙂 (jk) 😛 is going to fix it. If you just have to say it, do it in a private -PRIVATE- message. There is no penalty for being polite. You can’t be over polite on the net. And I promise you, the rest of the users on the forum, message board, etc. will appreciate your discretion. I’ve seen many online communities torn apart and fade away because of flame wars. No one wants to be involved in that.
8. Good or bad, if you post about someone else, make sure you wouldn’t mind them reading it. There is no such thing as a private post. If banks and schools can’t secure vital consumer information, what makes you think a social networking site can? Or would even try for that matter? It will get back to them, whether through a mutual friend, security failure or a deliberate hack, they will probably read it at some point. Make sure that you have said it to them directly first so that there are no unpleasant impressions of you left behind. Don’t be like the person that breaks up with someone via email. No one respects cowardice.
9. Don’t be vulgar. There are places for that and general topics and public networking sites are not it. Just because you are anonymous does not mean that you can’t be tracked via IP. Trust me, I’ve done it. If you want to post in an adult community, there are plenty out there. So if you post is Not Safe For Work (NSFW) label it so you don’t get folks in trouble or parents can catch it before the kids see it.
10. BE POLITE This is perhaps the best of them all. As I said, there is no penalty for being too polite. If there is even a remote chance that you might be misunderstood, clarify and clarify again. I’ve moderated in a number of forums and I can’t stress this enough. The way things are worded, phrased, and even punctuated goes a long way in setting the tone of a text post. Remember that no one can hear your voice inflection or see your facial expression. What was meant as innocuous teasing can seem cruel to someone who doesn’t know your posting style or is new to the community.

The internet is a place of freedom and self expression of a level that has never been seen before in the history of man. Don’t spoil it for yourself and others by assuming that everyone else is just like you. It’s very unlikely that someone will read anything the way you meant it to be read. If you see something you don’t like, give the author the benefit of the doubt – it’s probably not directed at you and not meant to be offensive. Not only that, chances are, it probably isn’t true. The anonymity of the net offers a place for people to exercise their alter egos. If you met them in real life, you’d never know it. Never take anything on the net too seriously, unless there is life threatening banter or talk of suicide. It’s for fun, let’s keep it that way.